Tears, Cheers, and Sunday Red

"My golf bag is a mobile dispensary” - J.O. (13 HC)

Genesis Recap

The Genesis Invitational did not disappoint, unless you listened to us and bet Max Homa at +2000. That makes Caddyshanks 0-1 in gambling picks. We apologize and vow to do better for our bettors. On the bright side, how awesome was it to see Tiger wearing Sunday Red again? Here's the final results:

It wasn't necessarily a two horse race, but it certainly felt that way most of the day Sunday, with Homa and John Rahm dueling down the final stretch. It also felt like a home match at times for Homa, who had the crowd behind him (he's a California Kid, so no shock there).

Ultimately, Max's driver didn't perform as well as it had been on the back 9 Sunday and the tournament came down to a heartbreaking, lip out chip on 18.

Meanwhile, Rahm continued to do what he always does - be a baaaaaaaad man and a damn good golfer. That's 3 wins for him so far this year, the fastest to 3 wins in a season since Johnny Miller in 1975!

Divots

Some other interesting things from the weekend at Genesis.

1. Rory McIlroy changed drivers between his first and second round. Stealth Plus to a Stealth 2 Plus. 39th in the field in “strokes gained: off-the-tee” Thursday… 3rd on Friday. Recorded the longest drive of the tournament, 388 yards. WTF.

2. In the third round, Tiger Woods shot his lowest round since the car crash, a 4-under 67.

3. Xander Schauffele dunked his 3rd stroke on a par 5 from 173 yards out to just barely make it inside the cut line of +1. Just a reminder: A couple weeks ago, in the final round of The American Express 2023, Schauffele holed out from 226 yards to make an albatross. Lucky bastard.

4. Collin Morikawa made history.

5. Max Homa and John Rahm traded punches ALL DAY LONG in the fourth round Sunday, providing tons of golf drama. Homa even almost holed out on 18 to put some pressure on Rahm. But Rahm succeeded, winning the Genesis Invitational, a hefty $3.6 million, and claims the new World No. 1 spot.

Meme Time

Not one, but three new golf memes for your viewing pleasure.

Buyers Remorse for Brooksie?

Search “buyers remorse” on Google News and you’ll see 4-time major winner and ex-PGA great Brooks Koepka’s picture.

Why is that handsome and sometimes platinum haired face plastered all over your screen?

He's reportedly feeling regret about buying into LIV Golf, even though he secured a $100 million guarantee from the league.

According to close confidants, Koepka "took the money when his brittle body was still being put back together" which sounds sad tbh.

Even though he recently got ass blasted while at the Saudi International and missed the cut by two shots (shot 74 and 78) at the International Series Oman, he’s apparently “feeling frisky and supposedly rethinking his career choice.”

Is this all rumor though? It could be. But someone from LIV is bound to defect BACK. I would be stoked if it was Koepka.

Golf Thing We'd Buy If We Weren't Broke

$3,000.00

Every major title is a huge deal, but few in the illustrious career of Tiger Woods can match the 2001 Masters.

Having won the 2000 US Open, 2000 British Open, and 2000 PGA back-to-back-back, Eldrick's 2001 Masters title completed the "Tiger Slam", making him the only player to hold all four major professional golf titles at once.

This achievement was celebrated on the April 16, 2001 issue of Sports Illustrated, with the simple headline, "Masterpiece".

For this item, the cover has been reprinted on canvas and finished with a unique black wood floater frame for a finished look. The canvas has been signed by Woods in silver paint pen, with his signature deemed authentic by virtue of Upper Deck Authenticated's Five-Step Process. Limited to just 106 numbered examples; the number of the item received may vary from the image above. via Uncrate

Can LIV Golf do this?

Max Homa was highly emotional after his loss on Sunday. Why? Because he gives a damn about the results. I just don't see how LIV, which hands out participation trophies, could ever authentically create these moments.

Max left it all on the course Sunday and further cemented me as one of the biggest Homasexuals on the planet.

That's all folks! See you Wednesday as we look forward to The Honda Classic, which is unlikely to field the top dogs as they rest for the upcoming Arnold Palmer Invitational and Players Championship.