If Kid Rock Hosted A Golf League

"Why am I using a new putter? Because the old one didn’t float too well"

-Craig Stadler

Honda Classic Update

Man, do I love a golf playoff!

We had a fun one Sunday between Chris Kirk and Eric Cole. Here's how it came to be:

On the par 5 18th hole on Sunday, with a 1 stroke lead, Chris Kirk put his approach in the drink.

So, it goes to a playoff, and this is how the playoff ended. First, a dart from Kirk.

Then, a heartbreaker for Eric Cole, who was automatic all weekend with the wand in his hand. Golf is just so brutal.

In 2019, Chris Kirk took time away from golf to handle issues with alcoholism and depression. So, to see him come back, win, and express gratitude for his life, family, and sobriety was an awesome thing.

Now, about that other golf league...

LIV Golf Recap: El Camaleón Mayakoba

It was crazy. The LIV golfers took out their American flags and trampled all over them and then took their old PGA cards and burned them in a pagan ritual. It was nuts. All you had to do was tune into the CW.

Ok but really. If I turned this piece into a corny, golf related, pros and cons list (which you bet your ass I will) I would overall grade it as a BOGEY. Here’s the specifics…

Birdie: The TV graphics and promos. Outside of the shot tracer which was run by THE cocaine bear, watching Cam Smith do a shoey was dope and hilarious. And the on-screen graphics were pretty sweet. Love the updated modern look and the color scheme.

Par: The field. I expected some good golf, but I also anticipated some terrible play too. As you can see by leaderboard here, I was right! Charles Howell III won by 4 strokes (-16, taking home $4 million), and dude by the name of Sihwan Kim finished last at +23. Woof.

Bogey: The on-air banter. It was too loose, even for me. And I’m looser than your mom.

Bogey: The heart. I mean it’s mostly missing, what can I say? Even though The Crushers took home the team win (Bryson DeChambeau, Charles Howell III, Anirban Lahiri, Paul Casey) and $3 million, it was like, “yay, yeah, cool, congrats guys”. Then I wanted to see what was happening in the Honda Classic.

Hole in One? If you're the type of person who wants a golf tournament to feel like a Kid Rock concert, LIV may be for you. It's also possible these two young ladies were protesting the authoritarian Saudi Gov't.

The Ratings? Not Great

I'm not going to jump to any conclusions here, but it's being said that "Worlds Funniest Animals" received a higher rating on CW - even with the two chicks making out.

According to early reports, they received only a 0.2 overnight rating for the 26 markets that carried it.

How To Suck Less At Golf

Lou Stagner is a great Twitter follow for any amateur golfer. His whole thing is about using stats to manage your expectations as a golfer.

Better Than Being At Your Desk

Tobacco Road, NC by @carolina_pines_golf

Chip Shots: Arnold Palmer Invitational

Where is it? Arnold Palmer’s Bay Hill Club & Lodge, par 72, 7,466 yards.

Who's playing? 44 of the top 50 golfers in the world.

Who won last year? Scottie Scheffler

Where can I watch? Thursday-Friday, 2 p.m.-6 p.m. (Golf Channel); Saturday-Sunday, 12:30 p.m.-2:30 p.m. (Golf Channel), 2:30 p.m.-6 p.m. (NBC)

Is Tiger Playing? No, but he has dominated this place in the past.

From 2000-2013, Tiger Woods was -109 in this tournament, 73 shots better than any other player in that span (Vijay Singh, -36). He won 8 times in 13 starts. via Justin Rey

Golf Thing We'd Buy If We Weren't Broke

There's a certain amount of balls required to wear cream white pants like this. What if you've got a sweaty ass? What if you've had too many transfusions, fall down, and get grass stains all over them? But what if you play your best round and look fresh af?

Haters will say it could never happen, but we believe in you.

That's all folks! See you Wednesday for Doin Lines: Arnold Palmer Invitational